This is always a tough time of year for me. Kids got back to school. We all get that last bit of vacation and say goodbye to our Summer Interns who have been helpful for the Summer. I kind of get attached to them. This year this was one special one in particular. This double update is dedicated those who have a bright future ahead of them:
So all the young studs I hired this summer are headed back to school. Recruiting and hiring good talent these days in California is very tough. Hiring good talent that is sexy is even harder. Everyone gets lured by bonuses, free food , and tuition reimbursements as well as promises of a nice salary upon graduation. Hey, but my Company has its own special perks. I promise all my sexy male interns that there will be no glass ceiling for them and that their talents will always be welcome in our organization. So the way it works at the end of the summer is that they each come see me individually and I tell them if they have an offer to join us upon graduation. I give them a corporate grade which includes a summer bonus and a formal offer which they have a month to accept. What’s the kicker? Well I’m sure you can guess, but let’s talk about it behind closed doors, shall we?
Business is a dog eat dog world. Play it nice and you will get eaten by the sharks. Play too hard and nobody will be your loyal soldier. Hey look, I’m not a fool. I know most bosses are men and they want to hire the hottest and sweetest women. Well here in RebeccasOffice, I hire the strongest and cockiest. I like to call my men, Business Barbarian Conans (BBC for short)? CLICK HERE TO GO SEE HOW I GET THE BEST AND BRIGHTEST TO WORK FOR ME!
Video (57 mins)
As many of you sports fans know, recruiting and signing the top talents to your institution is not easy.
Many people ask me what my secret is. I don’t really know if there is a secret, but I can tell you that this summer’s interns have been the hardest group I’ve ever had to nail down. Smart and talented from the top schools around the nation, recruiting these studs for the summer is one thing. Retaining them and keeping these rising stars from the clutches of our competitors is another. This year has been one of the hardest of all. So at the end of the summer we bring in the recruits we want to give an offer to and present them with a package before they go back for their final year of schooling. The goal is to sign them before the interviewing process starts.
This year we had a prize recruit that we wanted to bring back. A stud, this gentleman was my priority and I was not going to let him get away. He had an unusual request to bring him back to his summer sublet and I went along. When he asked me if I’d do anything for him to sign, I agreed on the condition that I could document the proceedings to make sure he did not go back on his word. I also needed to show the firm that I did not violate any laws to help bring this man into the fold. I was on a mission and this one was not getting away. Good news. He signed on the dotted line that night! Don’t be scared. Yes he spanked me really hard and I was screaming for mercy, but when you work for me, Rebecca works harder for you!
So if you want to succeed in business, pull out your penis, um….pen and CLICK HERE and take good notes.
Note: This recruiting video is dark and at some points boring, but I have left it unedited so you can skip to the better parts. Negotiations usually are not much fun, so feel free to fast forward to the parts where he was getting cold feet and pulled the covers over us. I needed to leave all footage in as well to make sure the firm documented my time spent. Remember, this was a training video, not a porno…LOL!